Why I’ve Changed My Pronoun

Wow, I just changed my pronoun at work! Here’s what I wrote. Feel free to share it:

“Hello all,

Today is a big day for me because I’m writing to ask you to change the pronoun you use to refer to me, in writing and in person, from she/her to he/him.


My He/Him lapel badge, from Shannon Marie Harm

I came out as non-binary transgender in 2014 and have been making changes to how I present my gender both socially and professionally. The time has come for me to change my pronoun in the workplace.

To explain…

For those of you who are unfamiliar with this idea, sometimes people decide to change their pronoun so that it falls in line with their internal sense of gender. Transgender is a broad term, encompassing people with a whole range of identities, so here’s mine: I am physically female (AFAB) which is something I don’t want to change, but since I was young my internal sense of gender has been non-binary – meaning neither fully male, nor fully female. The label non-binary helps people around me understand this, which in turn makes it easier for me to be myself and feel understood and accepted. This is why it’s important to me to change my pronoun.

People who are non-binary could choose any pronoun. Many choose they/them, but I prefer he/him.

Getting used to this change may take some time, and that’s ok. Some of you have known me for 10 years or more, so it’s only natural to need practice. Don’t be embarrassed to correct yourself, but do make sure you use my correct pronoun even when you’re talking about me and I’m not in the room – this helps form the habit.

To help with this change myself, I’ll introduce myself to any new people in the workplace by giving my name and pronoun (common practice in many LGBTQ+ communities).

If all this is new to you, some of it may seem strange and you may have questions. Not all trans people like to be asked lots of questions, but I am comfortable being a non-binary transgender activist. So, please don’t be embarrassed to ask me for more information about me, or about the topic in general.

Thank you for helping me make this change.