Relating Without a Map: Exploring new relationship paradigms
Until a year ago, Emily had only had heterosexual monogamous relationships with cis-gendered men. However, last year she met and fell in love with singer-songwriter, music lecturer and gender activist Kimwei McCarthy – who identifies as non-binary, assigned female at birth. At around the same time, Emily also diagnosed herself as having high-functioning autism. Emily and Kimwei now have a deeply committed partnership. They are also ethically non-monogamous. In this talk and discussion, Emily and Kimwei will share their experiences of the new relationship models they have had to create in order to celebrate each other’s differences and to enjoy a truly exceptional and fulfilling polyamorous relationship. They will also share some tools that can help you to discover what relationship maps are right for YOU.
It was my first time at Osho Leela this week, having heard about it for many years. I had a wonderful time and gave a gender-free self touch workshop and was warmly welcomed by all. I’d like to share a few testimonials from that workshop:
“The best workshop I have ever been to!’
“Exactly what my body needed.’
“I rediscovered myself – I felt like I was walking through woodlands I thought I knew, but discovering new fruit and trees’
Songs, stories and verse! What more could you want? Award winning poet Fiona Benson, international storyteller David Healthfield and myself bring you a wondrous night out at Gallery 36. In case that isn’t enough, enjoy all of this whilst surrounded by Veronica Goslings energetic and unique artwork.
This is a Bardic event, showcasing the Bardic arts (songwriting, storytelling and poetry) whilst doubling as the launch of my long awaited album “Nothing’s Binary”. You can pre-order the album HERE
Since numbers are limited, please book through Gallery 36 to avoid disappointment :
If you do have to cancel, let us know asap so we can offer the space.
Look forward to seeing you there!
Love and light
Singer-songwriter Kimwei brings captivating songs that unravel and bring light to the darkest corners “as though he’s giving each member of the audience an individual hug” – Blue Walnut, Torquay. (Featured on Sky Arts, BBC Radio Devon)
Fiona Benson is an award winning poet who’s work is brave, searing and deeply powerful (Forward Prize 2018, Seamus Heaney First Collection Poetry Prize 2015, Radio 4). Watch her read, here: FIONA BENSON
David Heathfield tells stories from around the world transporting us to every country with his warm charm, showing us the joys and sorrows of the human heart.
Since I changed my pronoun 2 days ago, and published the letter I sent to my colleagues on social media, there has been much discussion on my feed. Warm thanks to everyone who’s supported me and who’s contributed to the debate.
Here are a couple of videos I’ve made, in response to what’s been brought up, explaining more about my gender, pronoun choice and pronoun changes in general.
Enjoy. Share. Discuss. In doing so you changed the world 🙂
Wow, I just changed my pronoun at work! Here’s what I wrote. Feel free to share it:
Today is a big day for me because I’m writing to ask you to change the pronoun you use to refer to me, in writing and in person, from she/her to he/him.
I came out as non-binary transgender in 2014 and have been making changes to how I present my gender both socially and professionally. The time has come for me to change my pronoun in the workplace.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with this idea, sometimes people decide to change their pronoun so that it falls in line with their internal sense of gender. Transgender is a broad term, encompassing people with a whole range of identities, so here’s mine: I am physically female (AFAB) which is something I don’t want to change, but since I was young my internal sense of gender has been non-binary – meaning neither fully male, nor fully female. The label non-binary helps people around me understand this, which in turn makes it easier for me to be myself and feel understood and accepted. This is why it’s important to me to change my pronoun.
People who are non-binary could choose any pronoun. Many choose they/them, but I prefer he/him.
Getting used to this change may take some time, and that’s ok. Some of you have known me for 10 years or more, so it’s only natural to need practice. Don’t be embarrassed to correct yourself, but do make sure you use my correct pronoun even when you’re talking about me and I’m not in the room – this helps form the habit.
To help with this change myself, I’ll introduce myself to any new people in the workplace by giving my name and pronoun (common practice in many LGBTQ+ communities).
If all this is new to you, some of it may seem strange and you may have questions. Not all trans people like to be asked lots of questions, but I am comfortable being a non-binary transgender activist. So, please don’t be embarrassed to ask me for more information about me, or about the topic in general.
Thank you for helping me make this change.
There’s a bit more to do on the album, but mainly what I’d like from this Kickstarter, is to be able to get the Vansion I live in ready for winter. It would mean the world to me if the people who love my music would contribute to how I live as a musician and help keep me warm this winter.
The main cost is a diesel heater at £740, but if the target is exceeded or a cheaper heating solution is found, then I could also get all manner of bountiful things such as:
-tongue n’ groove wood cladding for the interior walls
-insulated window panels
-an additional cupboard (to help make room for the heater)
If you have something to contribute besides money, please get in touch, whether you have materials going spare, or can help to build, or to install the heater. If you have any of the following to give/lend, please let me know:
-A winter duvet
-Use of a sewing machine/workshop where I can make and install better curtains.
-A studio in London where I could record a drummer.
Kimwei takes his “Nothing’s Binary” workshop to the legendary Summerhouse Weekend at the end of August, as well as performing songs exploring gender and consciousness. This event is sold out, but watch this space and nothingsbinary.com for more gender-spectrum celebrations from Kimwei!
Don’t miss Kimwei’s workshop at Togetherness London on June 17th 2018!
We all have the desire to be fully accepted, yet being truly understood is rare. Why is this? When have we been asked to decide between inclusion and self-realization? When has it seemed necessary to go against our true nature in order to be loved?
This workshop explores the barriers that make aspects of ourselves, and others, hard to perceive, acknowledge and bring compassion to. These barriers might include societal expectations, manners, stereotyping or assumptions. The aim is to present simple but powerful tools to bring healing to our unseen qualities, encouraging connection.
You can’t be what you can’t see and you can’t be what can’t be seen. As a result, this workshop invites you to open your perception and discover exciting new realms in yourself and beautiful new ways of being with others.
Facilitator: Kimwei McCarthy
Kimwei is a singer-songwriter, university lecturer, intuitive therapist, digital nomad, blogger and lifestyle experimenter. He developed workshops which address unseen qualities as a result of his Nothing’s Binary project, which drew his attention to how aspects of us can go unseen if they don’t fit within the stereotypical frame of our physical gender. Like all our workshops, this space is inclusive to all and is LGBT+ aware.
Billie and I are proud to present the 2nd in our series of Nothing’s Binary music videos. We released this to co-incide with Exeter Pride 2018. Slugs & Spice is for when you’re evil but that it has nothing to do with your gender.
My goodness! It’s 1 year since the first Nothing’s Binary video went live, literally the day I wrote it! What a journey it’s been since then, from making the later video with Billie, to gigs where everyone already knew the words, gender workshops, events, Dartington LGBTQ+ festival (Outing) and more! Thanks to everyone who’s been involved in this journey. xxx